The Real UAE Driving License Test
The process for getting a driving license in the UAE has changed a lot in the last few years. One of the more recent changes is a theory component that tackles road safety. And while I think people who take the test are equipped to be better drivers, I can’t help but suspect that some of them have their test switched with this one instead.
Q1. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your ego?
If you answered 0-9, you are not eligible for a driving license
If you answered 10, please write ‘I am better than everyone else’ 100 times on the reverse side before answering the next question
If you answered 11 or above, please move on to the next question
Q2. When is it appropriate to flash your lights at another person on the road?
- Any time you are breathing
- It’s never okay – in fact it’s illegal
If you answered A, please move on to the next question
If you answered B, please do no attempt to operate a vehicle again
Q3. You want to turn right, but the lane on the right hand side has a large queue. What do you do?
- Join the back of the lane
- Go to the front of the lane and cut in
If you answered A, please move to North America
If you answered B, please move on to the next question
Q4. Which emirate has the worst drivers in the UAE?
- Abu Dhabi
If you answered A or C, please move on to the next question
If you answered B, please get your eyesight checked
Q5. Where is the best place to stop your car?
- In front of the exit or entrance to a building parking lot
- In moving traffic
- In a parking spot
If you answered A or B, please move on to the next question
If you answered C, you have lied about the size of your ego and are ineligible for your license