20 Questions Indian People are Tired of Hearing
People of every culture have to deal with annoying stereotypes. Unfortunately for Indians, the popularity of Bollywood has made Indian stereotypes incredibly famous. That being said, as long as people continue to ask Indians stupid questions, they will continue to receive stupid responses.
1. Can I come over to your house to eat butter chicken?
Sure, just swing by a restaurant and pick some up on your way over.
2. So are you going to have an arranged marriage?
As long as it is not to someone as ignorant as you.
3. How come you speak English so well?
How come you speak your national language so well?
4. So what’s the deal with the red dots on your forheads?
Green really doesn’t really work with our skin tone.
5. Do you pray to cows?
We spend as much time praying to cows as you spend praying to Pizza Hut.
6. Are you sure you don’t pray to cows?
We only pray to cows on Mondays. The rest of the week we pray to donkeys.
7. Why don’t you have a proper Indian accent?
Apu from the Simpsons had no time to give me lessons.
8. How many gods do you guys have?
I’m not sure… our cow population has significantly increased in the last few months.
9. Can you eat food that isn’t spicy?
No, that would anger the cows.
10. Is your uncle a snake charmer?
Yes and I will ask his snakes to swallow you whole if you ask me another dumb question.
11. Do you speak Hindu?
Actually I speak Christianity a little better.
12. So do you use skin whitening cream?
Yes and I eat it when I want to feel beautiful on the inside.
13. Why do Indian guys wear turbans on their heads?
It’s hard to find baseball caps in India.
14. Did you dream of being a Bollywood dancer?
Of course. In school we spent recess popping out from behind trees.
15. Will I get raped if I go to India?
Will I get fat if I go to America?
16. Do you speak Indian?
Just as well as you speak American.
17. Does your house smell like curry?
Only when we use our fish curry air freshner.
18. There is an Indian guy at my workplace called Sanjay. Do you know him?
Yes, we are going to have an arranged marriage on Thursday.
19. Aren’t all Indians vegetarian?
Yes, but don’t worry restaurants in India still sell chicken tikka masala for the sake of tourists.
20. I really want to go to an Indian wedding. Can I come to yours?
Okay, but you will need to learn how to properly pray to cows first.
The bollywood dancer was just great.These are just your observations or someone was dumb enough to ask them?
Never underestimate how stupid people can be
Note taken.
Funny! I’m guilty of asking #18 myself
No,the marriage will be on Sunday 😉 😛
Haha great, relatable post.
Haha are there any Indian stereotypes unique to Singapore?
Well I get the “do you speak indian?” or “how come you don’t understand bollywood movies?” (i speak tamil). They don’t get that indian languages are actual different languages with different scripts and not just dialects. People also find it strange that I don’t like chicken curry or chickpeas. Apparently it’s very “un-indian” of me. Oh and I totally agree with the whitening cream thing, I always get shocked looks when people realise I am not interested in whitening products.
I guess they aren’t very Singapore specific, I can’t think of anything very unique to us right now. :p
An Indian who doesn’t like chickpeas? Blasphemy. Living in Dubai I am convinced hummus is a food of the gods.
Oh no, not you too! 😀 Hummus is okay (if there’s no other choice), plain chickpeas though, not my thing.
A riot! Making note now and will refrain from further use!
But then I will run out of things to write about….
Oh, I think not…you’re creative enough to be the Energizer Bunny of the blogosphere….. 🙂
Haha thanks but some credit is due to the odd people who cross my path
A very funny post with great responses to annoying questions. I wonder if #18 is a need for people to find connections with others. When I moved to a different province, I couldn’t believe how many people asked if I knew their cousin/neighbour/co-worker who came from the same province as me.
Which province did you move to?
I moved from British Columbia to Nova Scotia. I’m back in BC now. When you’re affiliated with a sailor, it’s one coast of the other.
So you probably won’t take too kindly to me asking if you know my friend Rob from Nanaimo…
I know Rob from Nanaimo. We’re having an arranged marriage on Thursday! 🙂
Well played!
A fish curry air freshener. Now that is one way of getting rid of unwanted guests.
Great post. Had me in stitches 🙂
I’m sure fish curry air freshner would be a big hit with cats 😉
Reblogged this on Curry Pants on tour and commented:
Through one of my followers I just discovered this hilarious post which challenges some of the most common clichés about India(ns)terrifically.
Wow! What a great piece of writing. Popping out from behind trees is hilarious. The one question that I had to answer in the early days of migration was, “do people eat three times a days?” Yup, we just eat once and then do yoga rest of the time. Good observation cultural ignorance and stereotypes! And the question o had was, whether I play cricket and was Sachin tendulkar my neighbour….
The past few months in UAE, this has been the non stop annoyance…
“You Indian?”
‘Yes…’
“Malbari”
‘No I’m from Chennai. We actually have other states in India’
“You like Chennai Express yes?” (Unmitigated one-sided laughter)
-I have no smiley to express the pi**ed off look on my face-
🙂 I find saying things like “I don’t speak English” usually confuses people long enough for me to walk away.
Oh. My. God. This was ultra-hilarious! Amazing! This is really amazing! 😀 And completely understandable. I empathise well with this post. Cows can be great gods XD
Cows are pretty tasty gods too 😉
I second that 😛
Reblogged this on Twisted8 and commented:
This one can have you pee your pants. Amazing sarcastic shit 😛
Hilarious post! Again, amazing.
Thanks!
“Will I get fat if I go to America?” Lolol & mega-lols.
EJ x
So, ireally nees to know how to properly pray to cows before I go to your wedding?! Hehe
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