“I know all those words, but that sentence makes no sense to me” – Matt Groening
One of the most unfortunate facts about conversations is that they require a minimum of 2 participants. Ideally both these people will speak the same language. Over the years I’ve learnt there is no way to guarantee a meaningful conversation. There is however a way to guarantee an incoherent conversation and that is talking to Saudi-based colleagues.
“I think there’s an error in the brief you’ve sent me. It says the product removes stress from your hair”
“Yes dear that is correct”
“Oh. Can you perhaps explain what that means?”
“Dear it means taking the tension out of your hair”
Personally I regard my hair’s refusal to cooperate as a source of stress for the rest of me. While most people tease their hair, I firmly believe that mine teases me. My hair has zero reasons to be stressed and I’d imagine most people don’t believe their hair is stressed either.
I digress. Usually when I have trouble comprehending the English version of a brief I turn to an Arabic speaker at my office for help. Thus I’ve learned that akwatickbark actually means aqua park, bedkir means pedicure and keck means cake.
So in order to get to the root of the hair stress dilemma, I consulted an Arabic speaker with excellent English.
“Does removing stress from your hair sound like something that could have been literally translated?”
“Wait, isn’t hair already dead?”
“It must’ve died from the stress”
Interesting entry! Some languages use more descriptive elements than single words to express something or to describe it. For example the Hopi people use the description “it is notched many times” to describe something that has an attached fringe. I also find Arabic speakers are more descriptive (as a result of the way they use the language) and talktative of all my English Language students!
I suppose language evolves according to what each culture regards as important. English will never sound poetic 😦
I don’t know about that, I find there is poetry in the practicality. I love the way the English language changes depending on the country, the colloquial use and the slang make for colorful poetry to my ears!
By the way, perhaps your middle eastern gentleman should head a campaign for mens’ shampoo amed at the modern day “Sampson” whose hair practically was a living and quite stressed (by the time he was shorn)….! 🙂
My hair really has no cause to be stressed 🙂 I pander to its every whim and fancy in the desperate hope that one day, it will behave itself. Still waiting!
The only way to get your hair to cooperate is to shave it off 😉
ROFL…loved this post…and the last line had me in splits!
When your hair is stressed you should let it hide under a hat until it feels more comfortable.
As for language, I bet you’re ready to tackle Klingon.