The Philippines, Pretend Pregnancies & Other Peculiarities
It’s embarrassing to have someone think you are pregnant when you aren’t. Since I’m not particularly large, I’ve been fortunate enough to have been spared from the awkwardness. Well okay I was spared until I decided to travel to the Philippines.
You are probably thinking that I just happened to appear larger becuase I was in a nation filled with petite people. I might have agreed with you had anybody inquired about how far along I was when I visited Hong Kong, Taiwan or Indonesia.
I would prefer to blame this on the low cost of domestic flights in the Philippines for 2 reasons. Cheap tickets left me with more money to spend on filling my belly, and they also meant I would be at the airport having conversations with Cebu Pacific staff that went like this:
“Madam are you pregnant?”
“How pregnant do you have to be to not fly?”
“7 months”
“Umm… do I look 7 months pregnant?”
“Madam I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking”
Needless to say I returned back to Manila by bus instead of plane. After 7 hours of being stuck on a bus listening to cheesy love songs from the 80s, courtesy of the overhead speakers, I found myself booking another flight with Cebu Pacific. This time I was caught off guard twice. First, when the lady asked if I was pregnant. And for a second time when the guy sitting beside her winked at me and quipped, “Not yet, right?”.
I wasn’t willing to be in a similar situation the next time round. So when the time came to check in for my flight from Cebu to Palawan, I was prepared with a witty response. Or at least what I thought was a witty response.
“Madam, are you pregnant?”
“Yes, 10 months pregnant”
Either the lady who was helping me had just had Botox and couldn’t smile, or she didn’t find me particularly funny. Regardless of her reason, I was not satisfied. I was determined to come up with something better for my final domestic flight. Somehow that conversation was also nothing like the one I had scripted in my head.
“Here’s your boarding pass. Have a nice flight.”
“Thanks. Hey wait, you didn’t ask me if I was pregnant”
“We only ask ladies who look pregnant”
“But I wanted to slap the guy next to me and say it was all his fault”
“The boarding gate is that way. Next please”
Clearly she had just had some Botox work done too.
Pingback: HK Ninja : HK Q&AThe Philippines, Pretend Pregnancies & Other Peculiarities » HK Ninja : HK Q&A
I wish I had done this. Why do they ask? I mean 7mths is pretty significant.
Filipinos have a funny way of asking questions. I know that for sure. Trigger… memory is coming back… maybe a post. 😛
This is quite a funny story but its annoying on your part, I believe. Also happened to my mom but on a different setting though. 😉
I had no shortage of funny stories in the Philippines 🙂
What did your mum say to them?
Hi! As an (utterly embarrassed) Pinoy, I am sorry to hear about your experience 🙂 My countrymen do really have a way of asking really awkward and embarrassing questions. I don’t know what’s it with us — we greet people (from acquaintances to complete strangers) with questions — from the harmless: “who are you with?”, “did you eat already” “where are you going” to the downright ridiculous: “are you married?” “are you pregnant” “do you have children?” I am a Filipino but I feel downright murderous when I was asked before, “why didn’t you have children yet?” by an almost-stranger. I guess that’s our way of expressing our concern and goodwill… I hope you didn’t get too scared by the experience and visit us again 🙂
My personal favourites were “so what if he’s just a friend. You should marry him”
and “You used to be fat. You’re not anymore”
But every culture comes with craziness, not just the kabayans 🙂
Yeah, I agree with him. I’m so sorry if my people made things awkward for you. Do visit again. 😀
Oh don’t apologise! I’ve had far stranger experiences during my travels and my memories of the Philippines are overwhelmingly positive 🙂
Good! 😀
At least I am entertained! 😀
LOL. Too funny.
Stupid rules, tbh. But hey, cheap flights! You should write a post about the crocodile sisig. 😉
I should do a post with pictures of the faces people make when I mention how much I loved crocodile sisig 🙂
Yeah, including mine. :))
LOL i just stumbled upon our blog and I am laughing by now reading some of your posts ! I love you posts and this one is particularly so funny 😉 The questions you faced were embarrassing lol but these are the moments we remind when we look back ! Loved your writing ! Best wishes And Love xx
Thanks. I’ve been told my life is just a series of madness.
Perhaps you should take a look at my favourite post, ‘Why Janes and Jims are less prone to trouble’.
Oh just going to read it ! 🙂
I am sorry couldn’t find it, Please give me the link
Here you go https://acollectionofmusings.wordpress.com/2013/05/14/why-janes-and-jims-are-less-prone-to-trouble/
That was hilarious! I’ve been asked a few times at the airport ticket counter here if I’m pregnant. Since that’s the only place it’s ever happened, I’m going to hope it’s just a security measure!
Oh don’t take it personally. When CebuPac asked me the same question, I was taken off guard too and had to check myself if my tummy sticks out so much for me to look like one. But after having to take that airline a couple of more times, i realized that it was just their SOP, unfortunately, the way they ask is somewhat offensive.
What a funny experience lol :p